Assalamualaikum,
I recently told my mother about a woman I wish to marry. We’ve known each other for over two years and built a strong foundation of trust through Islam. To avoid sin, we mutually decided on a no-contact rule until we could pursue a halal relationship.
A few days ago, I finally worked up the courage to tell my mother about her. I shared her biodata and a few pictures, and at first, my mother seemed to like her. I specifically asked her to keep this between her and my father to avoid the evil eye.
However, I later made the mistake of sending her a few pictures of us together. She completely misinterpreted it and reacted with extreme anger. She started yelling profanities at me, insulting the woman I want to marry—calling her fat, dark-skinned, and ugly—saying I could do much better if she were the one choosing my spouse. It didn’t stop there. She spread hateful things about us to the entire family, accusing my friend of using me for money, saying she would cheat on me, and even worse things I struggle to repeat. She also showed everyone the pictures I had shared with her, completely violating my trust.
Now, it feels like my entire family is against me. My mother has threatened to kill herself and says Allah will punish me for \\\”disobeying\\\” her. She has made it clear she won’t come to my wedding and continues to insult this woman, referring to her with degrading language.
I feel completely alone in this. I’m struggling with my emotions, my work, and even fasting has become difficult. I don’t want to react in anger, but I don’t know how to move forward without my family’s support.
What should I do? How do I handle this situation Islamically while protecting my mental well-being? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
JazakAllah khair.